Pregnancy: Understanding the role of relationships, and mental health for healthy conception  |  Photo Credit: iStock Images
New Delhi: We are witnessing the breakdown of relationships all around us. While it is sad that this is happening, it is nothing new. Humanity has always faced problems, both at a collective and an individual level. What we see happening around us now has only changed in intensity and phase. The basic root of the problem remains the same.
The relationship between a mother and her child is said to be the purest, but we are now seeing families not wanting to have children, terminating them before they are born, or having children and then abandoning them to the care of housekeepers. How did this happen? This is a social problem arising out of many factors. Society in many countries around the world is at a stage comparable to the 1930s and 40s in America when women want to work and walk step by step in the competition alongside men. There is nothing wrong in it, but it should not be at the cost of something more important. If we go back to the root of our many problems, we can identify selfishness as the main factor, closely followed by competitiveness. But, the competition also has its roots in selfishness! It is all about ‘I, me and mine’. This means that togetherness is lost and relationships are forgotten. In this article, Kamlesh D Patel (Daaji), Guide of Heartfulness Institute, talks about the role of relationships and mental health in conception, especially as we experience a fall in both during the pandemic.
Role of relationships in conception and pregnancy
The fundamental question is – do we really want our relationships to work? If yes, is there a price that we are willing to pay for this to happen? Relationships are not a one-way street. They require trust and sacrifice. When we listen to someone with a lot of love, we display consideration and empathy. Submissiveness and surrender were once glorious virtues, but today these qualities are ridiculed. It is worth remembering that we are all human beings with defects. We have to learn to let go and be forgiving. For this, we need to work on ourselves and make wise choices.
When it comes to the conception of a baby, the attitude of the parents towards the pregnancy is very important. There is a world of difference between welcoming new life with joy and being unhappy about a pregnancy. The root of problems between children and parents often lies in rejection that has originated during the time of conception and pregnancy. The attitude of parents at the moment of conception determines the nature of the incoming soul and quality of their progeny. The future growth of the embryo and rearing of the children depend on external circumstances.
Dr. Bruce Lipton, in his book The Biology of Belief1, observes that genetic patterns and changes depend upon external circumstances. For example, when we are in a fight, our limbs are active. The sympathetic nervous system dominates and adrenaline rushes, making the blood flow to the limbs. Now, let’s imagine a situation where a pregnant mother lives in hostile surroundings and is forced to always be in defensive mode. The adrenaline in her bloodstream crosses the blood barrier and reaches the placenta. The foetus’ reaction to the presence of adrenaline is the same as that of the mother. The limbs of the foetus are supplied with a lot of blood at the cost of other organs. Brain centres are also activated because of these neurotransmitters. Dr Lipton goes on to conclude that in an unbalanced family, where there is no harmony, children will be born with longer limbs and the back of their brains more developed. Children born to understanding parents in harmonious families will have well-developed frontal lobes and cognitive abilities. The environment that children are born into affects their health and quality of life.
Parents (and parents-to-be) share everything that is good and bad with their child, right from the moment of (or even before) conception. This includes attitudes such as confidence and emotions such as fear. Even when one is alone, inner harmony with oneself – one’s inner nature– is very important. This connection with the inner self also affects the child. The solution to achieve the right balance is available for everyone who wishes to use it.
How meditation helps in improving mindfulness, easing pregnancy
Meditation helps us see things before we even think of doing them. This is because we observe our thoughts during the process. We are many steps ahead because we are not only looking at the action or the immediate phase before an action is taken but also already observing ourselves when we are in a state of intention. We regulate and fine-tune our intentions. We ask, “Should I have such intentions in my heart?” and our heart always guides us with a “yes” or “no”. Thus, we are able to prevent conflicts before they happen. In this, it is like vaccination, which helps to prevent a disease before it happens.
Meditation helps us evaluate whether our thinking is right or wrong, beneficial or not beneficial. So, when we meditate, we are able to see a clearer picture. This is the reason we are able to maintain an introspective process and see what is important and what is not important. The heart speaks louder than anything when we are listening to it. The more we listen to it, the more it guides us in the right direction. People often ask the question, “What can one do with eyes closed?” With our eyes closed, we are able to see things clearly, including our future and the future of others. We are able to see our intentions and clear them properly so that we can all support each other.
Disclaimer: Tips and suggestions mentioned in the article are for general information purposes only and should not be construed as professional medical advice. Always consult your doctor or a professional healthcare provider if you have any specific questions about any medical matter.